No - Not Wednesday

Why me? Why does this always happen to me? This past week I lost my Tuesday night golf day just because it was our wedding anniversary. To some of you this might not be such a big deal. But I'm a deranged golf nut. It hurts when I don't golf. OK, so I golf maybe another 4 days a week. But that means that I miss two whole days of golf a week!

Now let me tell you, Jim, Tim, and Lynn my Tuesday night golf buddies weren't thrilled when I told them that I might not be able to show up last week. ‘C'mon Charlie, what's more important?' Jim bellowed, forcing some of the people nearby in the dimly lit bar to look our way.

Lynn was appalled at the idea. But that's OK, Lynn's my number one enemy on the golf course. I hate him, and he hates me just as much when we're golfing. Winning the match is all that matters between us. There have been many times (when on the loosing side during a match), that I had to hold myself back from hitting him hard in the shin with my driver.

I tried to explain to the guys that Ginger and I had been married a long time, and I thought that she would probably want to spend the evening with me rather than the kids.

Finally I put my foot down. I told them I'd think about it.

That Thursday at my Nephew George's graduation which happened to be held at the Civic Center, my fate was sealed. I noticed that Tuesday on our Anniversary Michael Bolten was going to be in town for a concert. I knew my wife would love the concert. She loves Michael Bolten. What woman doesn't? What an idea I thought to myself.

But then again, I don't think I had ever been to a concert before. Gee how boring it would be. I mean I don't even like Michael Bolton mushy love songs! The thought was revolting.

I didn't mean to, but later when we were home I blurted out the words to Ginger, would you like to go......

Before I knew what had happened she give me a big smile and said yes. (I remember something like that happening around 20 years ago. But I think it was a different question! I thought to myself, OH NO. Now I'm committed. (Again?) (Well after writing this I probably will be committed, huh?)

The pit in my stomach was growing bigger and bigger as Tuesday grew near. I was actually going to miss my Tuesday night 4:07 tee time. This has never happened before, and I wouldn't be able to tee off again on Tuesday for another whole week. How terrible! My nerves were shot. I didn't know how much of this I could take.

After hanging up on two customers that Tuesday (accidentally), I decided I needed a drink. Maybe that would make me feel better. And the water did taste good. I felt better, and I certainly wouldn't dehydrate at least not within the next hour or two.

Then the big night came. I remember exactly where I was at 4:07. Hey this was really traumatic.

Thank goodness when we arrived at the concert I discovered that they served beer. I chugged two down real fast, because I knew I was going to need it. It would give me many excuses to leave for the bathroom later.

There we sat, and all I could think about was wondering what hole the guys were on.

Then the show started, and there he was. The man who had caused me undeniable pain that evening. I would have hit him, but he was around a football field away.

Then he started singing. Wow, this guy is good I thought to myself. But not as good as a birdie on the 18th hole. No, nothings that good!

As he sang and things progressed, I started to mellow a little. Instead of throwing sharp objects, I just committed to not applaud. I wasn't going to clap at all. I'd show him! I just sat there and watched, imagining that the microphone stand was a big 3 wood, and it was about to strike Michael Bolton's head. That made me feel better!

With some seriousness though, I will tell you that I totally enjoyed my ‘first' concert. Bolton even sang some opera and that was great. At one point he came into the audience and got close enough to see the feature's on his face. And yes, I did accidentally applaud after his second encore.

And if you hadn't figured it out yet, most of what I have said so far was somewhat of a white lie. I really did enjoy the concert, but not nearly as much as my wife did. What a great night, even though it didn't involve golf clubs.

So we get home and the kids are all sitting there. And Kathy asks how we liked the concert. Of course I replied that I really liked it.

Then in her sweetest voice she asked me if I knew the Spice Girl's were going to be in Pittsburgh in July.

I said well maybe we could go, what night is it? When she replied Wednesday, I thought to myself, ‘Oh no here we go again.'

Wednesday, no not Wednesday. What will Jack, Dan, and Mike say? No - not Wednesday!!

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Revised 6/18/98